Conal collapsed back onto his pallet and moaned, “How can I see her like this?  I’ve nothing left, she deserves much better.”

“I can tell her that you can’t see her yet, but you know Niamh, she will be out to see for herself sooner than later and that’s nothing I can stop.  She will.”

Conal lay still, he nodded to let Rhaury know he’d heard, but made no further move.  Iamerge saw a tear run down Conal’s face, past his ear and onto his pallet.  Rhaury reached out and patted Conal, a familiar and kind gesture that surprised Iamerge almost as much as learning that Conal was married.

“Well, the other fellows seem to be sleeping, I’ll have to see them another time it seems.  You think about Niamh and get word to me when you’ll see her.  But if it isn’t soon, expect to see her at your door.”

Rhuary turned and made for the door, his business finished apparently.  Iamerge scrambled to follow, “Mr. UiBirlinn, a word.”  UiBirlinn was already out the door, but he paused and turned back, holding the door.  Iamerge followed him out and Rhaury closed the door behind them.

“It’s hard to see men you command so. . .” UiBirlinn shivered and glanced back at the closed portal, “I might not have come except for Niam always being at my door asking after Conal.”  UiBirlinn kept his eyes on the door, looking away from where Iamerge stood.

The conversation had made another odd turn leaving Iamerge without an easy way to broach his subject, desperately wanting to bring the conversation around to his hold stake.  The awkward pause widened, “uh, well none of that is your fault.”

“No? Perhaps not, but in the end they are my men.  I did not anticipate these creatures, monsters, demons, whatever they are.  That’s why I advise you, the monastery, to invest in strong doors.  I doubt those monsters will be satisfied with raiding trade caravans.  In fact, there are likely to be no more of those while this is at issue.  Without caravans to attack they are likely to come looking for plunder, perhaps they but wait the day.”  Rhaury turned back, looking at Iamerge with intensity, “What do you think?”

Iamerge wrestled with the question and how he might turn it back to his hold stake, “I hadn’t thought of that. . .” He began, but he didn’t get to add to that ambivalence before Gospels arrived and Rhuary turned away to greet him.

“Ah, master UiBirlinn,” called Gospels.

“Gospels,” greeted UiBirlinn, “You look well.”

“True, I’m not dead yet.” Gospels nodded to Iamerge before stepping closer and smiling up at Rhaury UiBirlinn

Iamerge cursed his stupidity, he’d waited too long and missed his chance, he stepped back into the periphery, wondering how best to make a graceful exit.

“Well, I came to see my men.  As I was telling Iamerge here, I’m sure many men survived because of your care.  I’m grateful, of course.  Thank you.” Rhuary cleared his throat forestalling Gospel’s response and plunged on, “More to the point though, you’ve helped them, perhaps you should look to your own safety as well.”

Gospels looked puzzled, “In what way”

“Doors wouldn’t hurt, some sort of defensible position, what if the kind of monsters that tore up that caravan came against your monastery?  I shudder to think of the carnage.”  Rhaury glanced away toward the town, but the guesthouse and the hill too would have blocked his vision.  “We are trying to make the town more defensible, beyond reinforcing the walls we are adding strong-points along it and closing and guarding the gates at night.  Surely you need to make such preparations, abbot.”

Gospels smiled thinly, “Thankfully I do not carry that responsibility in these dark days.  I do appreciate your concern, but we have protections that you do not know.  Our God will supply all our needs, even if it is needful that we die martyrs for his cause.”

“That would be a very great waste and confirm much of what my mother has said of your order.  She is not very complimentary I fear, but if you would not protect yourselves for your own sake, I would beg you to consider the good you could do the citizens of the town.  If war comes, as I fear, we could use your healing hands much more than your martyred corpses gloriously scattered around this hill.  There will be death enough, I think.”

Iamerge slipped through the doorway into the guest-house.  Mostly he wanted to think, and think hard about how to speak to UiBirlinn about his hold-stake and further, from the conversation going on outside, it was clear that he ought to consider getting far gone from this place when he’d secured what was his.  But when he looked up, Conal was sitting and looking to him.  Iamerge knew that time to think was hard to come by and that Conal’s need would not allow it yet.

When Rhaury Ui Birlinn arrived with fresh horses and men Gospels had already whipped the brothers, the wounded, and Ui Birlinn’s guard into an organized column ready to make their way home.  It was much easier for Iamerge to turn off his mind and simply do as he was told. 

None of the work was particularly strenuous, just lifting and carrying and moving this cart behind that.  There were the wounded to load.  Some of that was difficult, not for the work, but because so many of the men were sorely wounded, afraid, and in pain.

With ruthless efficiency and tender care, the monks prepared their charges and then stepped out on their way home.  The brother’s chanted songs of praise seeming to be alter them into a work song that gave tired muscles strength in their need.  Iamerge felt it himself but saw even more the effect on Conal.

Conal was one casualty who bore the pain and indignity with indomitable spirit and good cheer.  Iamerge naturally gravitated to the man so that when the column pulled out of the camp it was Conal’s cart that Iamerge walked with, helping to push the ungainly thing up out of the valley.  Once that difficult stretch was passed Iamerge could walk beside the cart and listen to the man chat about life and a future in the midst of a situation that Iamerge could never imagine having hope.

“. . . In the LORD I take refuge. How then can you say to me: “Flee like a bird to your mountain. For look, the wicked bend their bows; they set their arrows against the strings to shoot from the shadows at the upright in heart. . . “ the brothers sang.

Iamerge shook himself.  Not for the first time he realized that his defenses had gotten sloppy.  Walking along with the brothers he had forgotten completely about the threat that caused these men their injury in the first place.  Yet he’d walked along not even aware to the degree that he followed the psalm singing of the monks much less look to the flanks for possible snipers bent on murder.  glancing around and cursing his laxity he noted that Ui Birilinn’s men were cautious even if he was not.  There were outriders he could see moving swiftly up and down the column as well as a few men in among the wounded as well.

“What is it Iamerge?” ask his charge.

Iamerge glanced over and saw that Conal looked distressed himself.  He was flushed and obviously uncomfortable, “I could ask you the same.”  Iamerge shook himself. ”I’ve no complaints.  My feet are a bit sore. . .” Iamerge realized his stupidity too late.  He looked over at Conal and would have apologized profusely, but Conal only laughed.

“I only wish I didn’t have the same problem.  I know they’re gone, but they hurt all the same.”  Conal cleared his throat, “Fact is, I’d really like some of that birch tea.”

“I’ll see if I can get you some,” said Iamerge.

“I’d thank you for it Iamerge,” said Conal, laying back on his pallet.

“I’ll get you some.” said Iamerge as he left to find what he could along the column.

It was dark in the scrub tree grove that slowed Iamerge’s headlong plunge.  This, this of death is not for me.  I’ve died a dozen times and never felt the bite.

There was a breeze that ruffled the woody firs, Iamerge turned and looked.  The Wanderer, tumbling as it went, fled away like he had.  The darkness all around him felt oppressive despite the moon wind.  He stopped to look up at a sky full of stars.  Why should I flee what may never touch me?

In the night the chanting of the monks came to him out of darkness, “. . .God, who searches minds and hearts, bring to an end the violence of the wicked and make the righteous secure. My shield is God Most High, who saves the upright in heart. God is a righteous judge, a God who expresses his wrath every day.  .  .”

Was this destruction and death the expression of an angry God?  And where?  Where, out in all that dark, is a god.  I see a little light, glittering points of beauty, but where is God?

” . . . He who is pregnant with evil and conceives trouble gives birth to disillusionment.  He who digs a hole and scoops it out falls into the pit he has made.^”   Iamerge chuckled to himself.  He sat among the needles and litter.  I wonder if a pit might not be preferable to death, a safe place.  I should dig a hidee-hole. 

The chanting rose, recapturing Iamerge’s notice, “I will give thanks to the LORD because of his righteousness and will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High.”

Iamerge sat breathlessly.  The silence made him fidget and he would have rose and walked back to the fire if he’d been sure of the way. 

Then low and slow the monks began again, building quickly, “O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory above the heavens.” Iamerge turned to the sound.  He could see nothing of the firelight.  He clambered to his feet, feeling as he began to walk to the sound.  “From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise because of your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger. . .”

He shuffled forward, waving his hands before him in the blackness.  A root seemed to grab his foot and he pitched headlong into a low bushy tree.  He stumbled and tried to catch himself, but tangled in the branches he went down hard.  Iamerge struck his head and saw stars of a sort.  He rolled over, stunned, and saw above him the stars of the sky.

*  *  *

Conal lay in pain. His legs ached from well below where he knew they now ended, from phantom feet all the way into his belly.  He wept, but not for the pain, he wept for joy at the sound of the monks chanting their prayers to the LORD. 

He gazed at the beauty of the heavens through the blur of his tears.  The brothers began again, “O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!”  My lord too, now.  

“You have set your glory above the heavens.” Above even those stars? I wish I could sing like the brothers. “From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise because of your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger.”

I’m ready to die, I could go now and happily.  What use could I be, that the LORD wants me? ”When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?” 

In the dimness of the firelight, Conal seemed to hear a still small voice, or he simply knew in his soul, “You will live and you will serve me well.  I have loved you, Conal, from everlasting.”

The brothers sang, “You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor.  You made him ruler over the works of your hands; you put everything under his feet:  all flocks and herds, and the beasts of the field, the birds of the air, and the fish of the sea, all that swim the paths of the seas.”

Then I will serve you all my days.  Conal’s spirit sang with his brothers, “O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!

*  *  *

Iamerge’s mind whirled in chaos and fear, It was stupid to run out into the night.  What was I thinking?  Weren’t their corpses he’d seen, men who had fallen to those beasts?  Why did he fear to see that man die with him sitting helpless beside?  What was so hard about that?

Iamerge looked up and saw a shadow blocking the stars.  He cringed, fearing the beast-men.  The Stranger only, He thought, around its rim was the dim light of the three stars of Tir na Nua, but the Stranger kept most of that light sending only a little back out to be seen.

Iamerge got to his feet with care now.  His senses were alive.  Realistically, it was unlikely that those things would return.  Then too, he was not far from the men.  Conal’s death had un-nerved him and then stumbling in the dark had brought panic.  He was fine and would be fine. Soon enough he would see his way clear. 

Iamerge felt something on his forehead, he made to brush it away and his fingers came away wet.  He was bleeding.  “There now, I’ll not escape this foolishness without embarrassment,”  He said in the night.

In the dimness he felt something at his feet.  He reached down and his probing fingers found a long branch, like a staff.  He grasped it and used it to return to standing.  Iamerge’s head ached abominably, but the rough wood in his hands was a comfort.  He felt less vulnerable.  Now nothing left but to find my way back.  then I’ll add myself to the wounded souls around the fire, he thought.

Again he heard the monks chanting, “I will praise you, O LORD, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonders.”  It was a matter of minutes fumbling in the dark and he saw the glow of the fire before him and the blue light of Spark lightening the horizon,

“I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing praise to your name, O Most High. . .” the brothers sang as Bright, the blue star, rose.

At the fore were Ui Birlinn and his men.  They looked weary, and their horses looked worse.  Ui Birlinn pulled his horse out of line as he drew near Iamerge and Gospels, but he motioned the rest of the column on without him.

Rhaury Ui Birlinn smiled and nodded, “I’d not thought to see you again Gospels, but I am glad that there is some good that’s come of the day.”

“Some good and some bad.” said Gospels, “What did you find?”

Rhaury winced and looked down into the valley where the devastated caravan lay, “As to that, death, and some ruin.” He looked back at the two, “and yon caravan beset.”

“You saw who did this?”

“Yes, when I gave chase.  Gospels, you have never seen a more brutal lot.  Our caravan coming up behind these poor folk drove the monsters off, and when I came with the relief we pursued.  I think they are not used to being chased.  We caught them at camp farther down the valley.  I’d heard the reports of the guards who fought them, but I couldn’t imagine, can’t tell you.  These were not men, not in any sense that we know them, they were more like beasts.”

“So you think they were not of the family of man?  Did they bear some sigil, some banner?”

“Not that, they were a war band because they went armed.  Savage, fanged, long armed brutes, they were powerfully built, more than even the doughtiest warrior you’ve known.” Rhaury shook his head, “Nothing in my experience compares.  The largest might have been the height of a man if he stood straight, but they crouched, came at us with their weapons.  Most of them were much shorter than a man, but then they all may have weighed more, even the smallest.”  Rhaury eyes glazed as he remembered, “It was strange.  There were some that were short, as if they were of a size, by comparison, of a child, but they were all as murderous as the largest.  I think our horses were all that saved us.  A man and a horse over matched what they would otherwise tear to pieces.”

Gospels shuddered, “Do you think they are well gone then?”

“Who can say?  I have wounded that can ride and I’m taking them and my caravan to Beallton.  I’m sorry that I forgot to give the brothers word.  What errand brought you and your brother this far?  I advise you show proper caution, this all started last night.”

“We have more brothers coming  . . .”

“Gospels, I do not mean to say that I’ve abandoned those I’m leaving.  We need new horses and then we will return.  It is wretched what has happened to the other caravan.  There are a few survivors, we were coming to get your assistance for them . . .”

“No worries, I think that Hebrews should be here soon with carts and stretchers . . .”

“I fear there will not be need for very many,” said Rhaury

“What is it Abbo… err, brother Gospels.” said the young brother.  Iamerge noticed it was Hebrews as he gave Iamerge a shy smile and nod.

“Iamerge believes there has been another trade caravan attacked.” said Gospels.  “It has been some time since the rescue party or perhaps relief has gone out.  There may be dead and likely injured from one party or the other.”

“Dire news.” Hebrews gasped, though it seemed to Iamerge that there was more of excitement than horror in it, “Shall I gather some brothers and. . .” Hebrews looked puzzled, “which way should we go?”

“Go first to the Abbott, I do not command any but myself.  Say only that Gospels recommends that the guest house be prepared to receive wounded.  Then if he thinks it wise and at his command come after we two who will go on down the South road to see what we may see of this disaster.”

“Could I not come with. . .”

“No Hebrews, the brothers must hear of this first, and the Abbott must make what provision he sees fit.  Just tell him that we go down the South Road after Ui Birlinn and several mounted men and that we know nothing more of what may have happened.  Your speed will be a greater blessing to bring the word and likely you will catch up to us even with carts and stretchers and all manner of healing herbs in tow.”

“Yes Abbo. . .  I mean brother.”

“Off with you,” said Gospels, but Hebrews was already running toward the monastery with his habit hiked up to free his legs for maximum speed. “The righteous will live by faith, and there are few more faithful than that boy.” Gospels glanced at Iamerge, “I hope that I didn’t speak out of turn when I said we would go ahead.”

“I will go with no complaints.  I should like to know what all the fuss is about.  Then too, getting it straight at the source will give me some news to bargain with the mayor of rat town.” quipped Iamerge as he readied himself for the walk.

“Indeed, Mr. Cooper will want to know all about it, I’ve no doubt.” And off Gospels walked at a goodly clip.  Iamerge followed.

Gospels lead straight down the hill and onto the road.  When they settled on a comfortable pace Iamerge asked, “This is not the first attack I gathered.  Do you know who is doing it or why?”

Gospels frowned, “Sadly no, if it were bandits there would be less of value left behind.  Sometimes bandits take hostages and make demands.  But this is just slaughter.”

“And they take nothing of value?”

“I didn’t say that, much is left, but not weapons nor things that can easily be made into weapons.  Sometimes they leave their own weapons behind, heavy stone axes, brutal spears, clubs, that sort of thing.  They take food and sometimes they kill horses, but they don’t seem to take them.”

“Who are they?” ask Iamerge.

“That no one knows.”

They walked on in silence for awhile.  Matching each other, they strode down the road.  After awhile, Iamerge noticed that Gospels was glancing over at him from time to time.  He wondered if perhaps the pace was growing too much so he eased off.  Gospels continued to glance over as they walked a little slower.

“Iamerge,” Gospels said finally.

“Yes?” he answered.

“I hope I didn’t press you into something you wouldn’t otherwise have done.”  Gospels laughed, “It is like me to charge off on this sort of venture, but I’m getting older if not wiser at the same pace.”

Iamerge smiled, “No no, I’m glad to go.  I should have thought to bring word to all of you.  Just, in town it seemed of no consequence to any but Ui Birlinn and his party so I guess I thought it must have been a thing very far away.”

“True, it might be.” Gospels began, “But Rhuary is cautious where his father was, well, impetuous like me,” he laughed again. “If he rode hard out of the town then I think it likely that it was no farther than horses might run safely.  Horses are not easy to come by here abouts.” Gospels looked sidelong at Iamerge.

“Did I mention that Ui Birlinn was the one with whom I had business?

“I’m not positive, but I inferred it.”

“So it seems my business lies this way also.”

“Indeed, I should confess that I believe you are a survivor.  I would charge ahead when wisdom, and survival, might bid me wait.  So, I hoped to bring you for some degree of protection, if not from villains then certainly from myself.”

It was Iamerge’s turn to chuckle, “Well then, if I get that feeling, I’ll bid us both stop and if need be reverse and run us back to Hebrews.”

“That is wisdom,” said Gospels, “I expect that young man soon enough.”

“Ah, then I’m warned,” Iamerge laughed, “I’ll keep an eye on our tail lest young Hebrews runs us down in his haste to get to the adventure.”

“I would scold you for wronging my dear brother, but I suspect you may be right.”  Smiling they both walked toward the crest of the hill

Gospels grew serious, cleared his throat he said. “I pray God this isn’t what I fear, but I pray without much hope.  These attacks have become more frequent and this, well, this is too near for my peace of mind.”

They crested the hill and began to descend into another valley.  Almost immediately they saw below them a chaos of broken carts and broken men.  There was little enough movement, but there were clearly men moving through the wreckage.  Then off to their right, on a turning they saw a caravan making its way up toward them.